why a dingo will never eat my baby
I read way too many baby board forums about babies sleeping through the night and it's starting to make me crazy. First of all I have to say technically "sleeping through the night" means five to six hours at this age, which lets be honest is so far from sleeping through the night, because five hours means I'm up before 1:00 feeding Addilyn. NOT sleeping through the night. So when people say their babies are sleeping through the night I don't really know what they mean.
I kind of (okay really) hate seeing other mom's pictures and statuses when they say how many hours their babies slept. An immediate wave of jealousy and frustration comes over me and then lots of thoughts of what am I doing wrong. I seriously celebrate when Addilyn sleeps a six hour stretch and wakes up only twice before 7:00. Chalk it up to four month sleep regression, a growth spurt, having a cold or just being a baby and these days I'd celebrate her going four straight hours just once through the night.
When she was two months old she slept a few eight hour stretches and I seriously felt like we were on top of our sleeping game. I thought we had an above average sleeper and were in for some many sleep filled nights ahead. Well our baby girl had a different plan, which is really no plan at all. She is all over the place with sleeping the last month and has not repeated that eight hour stretch once. And lately we are back to how she slept as a newborn.
Whenever I read someone's status about their champion sleeper or read a baby board post about the same, I want to know. Are they swaddled? Do you nurse them to sleep? Do you feed them on demand? Do you sneak some sleeping drugs into a night time bottle? And what I really want to ask and assume the answer is yes is "are you lying?" Because that one always makes me feel a little better about our situation.
This article has been the best thing I've read when it comes to sleep training. Besides making me laugh, it reminded me that I need to relax, keep trying and do what works best for us. Plus it's safe to say that Addilyn is just so smart she'll never get eaten by a dingo, day or night.
So we're working on baby steps in the sleep department, even if that means sleeping on the floor in Addilyn's room as we work on transitioning her to a crib. Just kidding. That would just be silly.
P.S. I have read many different sleep approaches, received a lot of wanted and unwanted advice and am kind of at a point of where we've tried everything we are willing to try the time being, so we're just going to keep trying. I'm banning myself from reading articles, books, and baby boards for the time being because it is making me crazy. So if I'm being completely honest, unless you want to come over and spend the night and show me in person your successful sleeping techniques just tell me to hang in there and that babies are babies and are hard sometimes. ; )
Oh and here is another article for any of your sleepless mamas that I loved.
Take it one day at a time and I love your current ban of reading/researching baby sleep on-line. Sometimes there is just too much information/opinions out there. Keep plugging away; you both will figure it out soon enough :) Whitney
ReplyDeleteWe were talking about how each of us has our own testimony in bible study yesterday and that is because we can always help someone later by telling them about because we were once in that exact situation. My point is, in a year, or maybe in a few weeks, there will be another poor sleep deprived mama and you will be able to tell her you survived. Until then, keep swimming. PS. I would totally come give you a nights break if I lived there, just because we all need a break every once in a while.
ReplyDeleteYou can talk to me at any hour of the night if you are lonely, we are 100% sleepless. One night last week A's longest stretch was 1 hour 20 mins.
ReplyDeleteMy son did not sleep through the night til he was almost 2. I was really hopeful it was his situation (cancer, pain- not that I ever hoped him to be in pain) but now I just think I have babies that don't sleep. BUT I think it's a trade off. I have a friend with children the same age as mine, both truly sleeping through the night at a month old, but wake up by 5am, the oldest still at 3 years. My son will sleep in til 9am now. So I thinking they either sleep early, or sleep better later
Aw sweetie, it IS super hard! Olive sleeps through the night right now (930-730), but there is absolutely no trick to getting it to happen - I think its just because she got the lazy gene from me AND I started supplementing (which has had repercussions in its own right). On the flip side, she will NOT go down for naps during the day and thats super hard too. Makes getting things around the house done impossible! Hang in there Mama!!
ReplyDeletexo, Katie
Well, I know we have already gone over our sleep woes with each other so I'm just dropping in to say this is hilarious because my husband says that line from Seinfeld at least once a week. Maybe the dingo ate your baby! It's his favorite episode.
ReplyDeleteI'm stopping by from Bonnie's blog - sleep is different for every baby. My second child sleeps so differently than my first ever did. And she's 7 months old now and still not "sleeping through the night". I figure I'll sleep again in 18 years, right??
ReplyDeleteJust reading the title to this makes me laugh. Thanks! And trust me, you will sleep again!
ReplyDeleteThree kids, all "trained" the same and all slept (and still do sleep) very differently. What I'm learning about sleep lately, is that as a mom, my sleep is not my own. It is subject to whoever and whatever happens during the night. Hang in there :)
ReplyDeleteHi Katie! I'm sorry it's been rough! I hate to admit My son is 16 months old and still wakes up once at night, just wanting to have me near. It's awful.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite article about sleep training is this - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ava-neyer/i-read-all-the-baby-sleep-advice-books_b_3143253.html
I promise you have to read it. It's hilarious. No real advice -just read it!
Love you, girl!
I know exactly what you mean Katie, I never understood what people meant either with 'sleeping through the night'. And all those 'my baby's such a great sleeper' updates on facebook made me want to scratch my eyes out!
ReplyDeleteUntil he was about 10 months old I still nursed Micha around midnight and I still nurse him at 5 or 6 in the morning.
And he still wakes up sometimes if he can't find his paci.
And you know what, even I'm still not sleeping through the night at age 28, sometimes I just need to go to the bathroom, you know ;).
Hang in there!
I remember those days....in fact, they were just a few months away. I remember praying for 4 hours of sleep in a row! It will get better, I promise! She will sleep when she's ready, and you will appreciate it SO much! My son is 14 months and he didn't really sleep the entire night until about 11/12 months, and still it's not perfect. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteI think every baby just sleeps differently. Out of the 7 of us kids, some slept all the time, and some never slept at all as infants and grew up to be highly energetic bid kids that also didn't need much sleep. :P My youngest sister didn't sleep through the night for a year, but by then my Mom had three teenage kids, so she's wake us up and we'd all take an hour shift if needed.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean. I read the Baby Whisperer and I wanted to kill her by the end, because I tried everything with my son and nothing worked. Like you, I read everything about sleep and here's the truth, your daughter, like my son, will sleep through the night when she is ready, no sooner. I tried everything and nothing worked. I know it can be extremely discouraging to read how other people's kids are sleeping through the night and they act like everything is perfect, but remember appearances can be deceiving. Nothing is perfect. Good luck sweetie, I've been there. Just remember to do something for yourself and get out of the house for breaks.
ReplyDeleteAgi:)
vodkainfusedlemonade.com
i think (obviously i don't know) that has got to be one of the hardest parts of having a baby- the lack of sleep! I am so content in getting my 8 hours! im sure its a very tough thing!
ReplyDeleteOh no! I hope this isn't my fault! Every baby and mommy combo is different. You'll do things differently with your next kid. Because your next kid will be different than this one. :) With 3 kids, I have slept on the floor. More than once. I have crawled out of rooms and tiptoed around that one stupid squeaky board in the hallway. Because of Jordyn's milk allergy, I would have been ecstatic to get the amount of sleep that you are lamenting about. lol. Try a baby screaming at the top of her lungs in pain from 2-5 am EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT. for MONTHS. Because of her dust mite allergy that wasn't diagnosed until she was 2.5 years old, we often got up several times a night for years and she always woke up a terror child. Notice the larger age gap between my last two kids? Yep, there's a reason for that. I'm not trying to one up anyone, just saying that I totally understand what it feels like to be sleep deprived and I am sorry that you are experiencing that now. I can also say with confidence that God gave THIS baby to YOU and that he has also EQUIPPED you to be HER momma. You will do what you think is best for her in this season of life because you love her, even if that comes at a high cost to you. You're doing a good job, Momma. Nothing lasts forever. Including this!
ReplyDeleteHahaha! That article is great. And not every baby is the same. I can only imagine the sleep adjustment you wonderful Mamma's go through. Don't think for a second I won't be emailing you at 2 am when mine won't sleep! haha
ReplyDeleteHang in there ;) Love you friend!!!
ReplyDeletehaha girl that is funny. I was just thinking how my next post was gonna be.. If I hear the question, is she sleeping through the night? one more time!.. i seriously know how you feel.. I also am like really? How did your baby just sleep for 12 hours?! Sounds like Kenzie is right on the same page as Addilyn! Lately she's only going about 3-4 hours before waking to eat..(not swaddling..just in her rock n play). Ppl are recommending the CIO but we're just not ready for that yet (if ever).. You let me know if you find something that works!
ReplyDeleteI was pretty much going to say what you put in your PS! Audrey is an awful sleeper- even now at 21 months she rarely sleeps for 10-11 hours without waking. Sometimes she just cries out in her sleep, other times she needs to be rocked back to sleep and a few times she wants milk. She's way better than she was a year ago so I don't complain about it now! My husband also helps with the wakeups now whereas he didn't the 1st year when I was on mat leave.
ReplyDeleteIt's tough, and you will survive!
Soon it will be a blur and you will miss those middle of the night cuddles.
Katie, I had this with Dahlia. I was so confused. One day she'd do great (sleep more than 5 hours at night) and some nights I felt like she was anti-sleep just for the heck of it. There really was no rhyme or reason and like you, I read other mom's statuses baby bragging and wanted to punch the screen or ask them why they were lying. Ha! I have no idea, to this day why she was sporadic. I tried every combination of everything possible and nothing gave us consistency. We transitioned her to a crib after show outgrew her co-sleeper. We tried sleep training her eventually. Still, some nights were hard, and she wanted to party for a couple hours for no reason or any reason at all. I was so tired and annoyed and felt like I was failing or that me nursing her was causing a problem. Looking back, none of those things were the case. There just wasn't a reason. And that was, for me, one of biggest light bulbs that went off in my brain. The "sometimes there is no reason, sometimes there is no answer but I am still doing it right" light bulb.
ReplyDeletePeople would say, "she misses you, that's all.." which could have been true. But I didn't care. I was defeated and felt dumb that my kids wasn't a "good sleeper" Or, "try this or that or eliminate this from your diet blah blah blah." Nope. None of that worked and I still wanted to punch :) However, she magically, with time starting sleeping wonderfully. And I still have to tell myself with the babies, there might not be a reason, there might not be a fix but you ARE doing it right. And hooray for not ever getting eaten by a dingo. I worry about that sometimes with my kids ;) And plus, big bonus: you don't want to punch like I did. That's progress. I may or may not have anger issues ;) You're an awesome mom. I hope you are able have more celebrations, big and small this week!<3
I skimmed an article last night that basically said STOP read articles and trying to take everyone's advice. You know what's best for you and baby and no one else can tell you! I know I drove myself crazy trying to figure out the "right" or appropriate way to take care of Mia but it's so true! We WILL go crazy by reading stuff and wondering why it doesn't work for us! So just know that you're doing an AMAZING job!
ReplyDeleteAnd on another note? Mia was sleeping through the night (I'm talking, THROUGH the night. Going down 8-9 and waking up 5:30-6:30 which is when we get up anyway) by 2 months. But she totally hit the 4 month sleep regression and when I was in for her 4 month check up I asked my dr if I should start feeding her rice cereal at night or what because I was going CRAZY not sleeping through the night. He looked at me and said, "You DO know that most babies don't sleep through the night at this age, RIGHT?!" I told him of course but MY baby isn't like other babies (ha ha). But seriously. It last a month. And it was R O U G H! But it does get better!
Hope that you both start getting more sleep soon!
ReplyDelete