. . . for Lauren and Lauren: When you let it in . . .

August 20, 2014

When you let it in . . .


It's a slippery slippery slope when you start letting anxiety creep in.  

We had Addilyn's one year check up (a month late) last week.  We had some worries earlier on with her weight, but chalked it up to her being pretty sick around six months, throwing up often and not eating a lot because of it.  For a month or so I got pretty anal about her eating, offering her food all the time and weighing her on our scale.  My worries were subsided when we went in for a weight check six weeks later and she gained a little weight.  I decided I was making myself crazy and worked hard to not be worried about it.  

So I was surprised at her appointment when she had hardly gained any weight the last three months and has continued to drop in percentile over the last six months.  I know the doctor is just trying to cover her basis, but that combined with a pretty constant nightly cough, she brought up some scary causes and seemed more concerned than I had expected.  She wants us to do a few tests to get the scary stuff out of the way and check for other more common things as well.  

I know the chances of her having a serious disease are so slim, but to put that thought in my mind is terrifying. When I let a heavy, anxious thought creep in, it's so hard for me to fight off others. The next day I was running and was worrying about the what ifs, and the thoughts of something being wrong with Addilyn.  Although nothing to do with it, I started thinking about our scary incident when Addilyn passed out after falling a month ago.  It took awhile for me to get that image out of my mind, but there it was back again. Over and over.  

In that moment I was so aware of how Satan tries to sneak his way into my thoughts.  To make me feel scared of the future, doubt God's protection and feel anxious.  I don't think there is anything wrong with being nervous or wanting to find out answers and feeling unsettled.  I think those are the times that God uses circumstances to draw us closer to him.  But I do think it's wrong when you let your worry be stronger than your trust for God.  I struggle with letting anxiety take over my thoughts. I forget God's truths and feel overwhelmed with worst case scenarios.  

It was a reminder that I need to cover myself with God's truths.  I want to be able to fight off my worries with His word and protect myself from going down that slippery slope of fear and anxiety.  Over and over again I've seen God answer my prayers, calm my worries and take care of my family.  And I know he will continue to do so over and over.  

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muriel said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

It's so easy to worry as a mom. Hope everything turns out ok. She's a cutie. :-)

Megan C said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I bet that is hard, hope everything turns out alright! Praying for her!

Carol Hines said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Read this over and over, as often as you need to. Well said!

Jen V. said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Thank you, I really needed this right now.

I will say some prayers for Addilyn!

Lins - Domesticated Working Woman said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Praying so hard for health, peace, and good news.

Laura A said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Praying for you and Addilyn!

Christina Schergen said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Love this and your heart!
I just keep this scripture handy anything I feel the enemy attack.. "7 For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

eliz said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I agree....sometimes bad thoughts creep in...especially because we worry so much! Mya has not gained weight in 3-4 months....plus she is 15 months and not walking and only has 2 teeth....I worry and worry...then I worry I am doing something wrong...and so on. But just think positive thoughts and not let any negativity get the best of you.

Suzanne Bruce said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates


Suzanne Bruce said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I hope this cheers you up;)

maria said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Ugh, worrying about your baby is the worst! Prayer is the best weapon against it!

The Lady Okie said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You have such a great mind- set about this, and it's an example to me today. I worry about a lot of what ifs, but I read a blog post last week about how anxiety is just placing our faith in ourselves, pretending like we can control things, which obviously we can't. It's a comforting thought to know that God is not surprised by anything that happens, and he is always watching over us,even if our worst fear comes to life. I'm trying to take to heart the verse about counting it all as loss for the sake of knowing Christ.

Lauren {Fizz and Frosting} said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I so needed this little reminder today. I had a health scare earlier this week and it is so easy to let the fear and anxiety to take over. I'm trying to give my worry over to God and praying that all is well with Addilyn! (I'm sure it is!)

Jen said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Harper slipped from the 90's to 40's over the last 2 appointments & our doctor was making me anxious, too. I feel ya!

Carrie Corrigan said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I'm sure sorry to hear this. Hang in there!! Everything will be ok. Sending my hopes for good health & inner peace your way!

Ashley said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I feel like this is a constant in my life when dealing with noahs weight issues. Everyone has their opinion, the dr is concerned, nurses aren't, pediatrician isn't, family is, m and I are just caught in the middle. Then it comes down to me because I was Noah's main food source - am I not doing enough? Should I be concerned. Give him formula, or don't. Just stuck. Then I have recently came to the realization that he is who he is and some kids are just small. He's never lost weight. I'm not a bad parent, but that anxiety is easy to creep in, especially when you have people asking you if you feed him enough. I'm soo sorry you have to deal with this. I'm sure she's just growing at her own pace too! But I soo remember and still deal with the weekly weigh ins and there not being a gain and I felt like a huge a failure and couldn't wrap my mind around why!! Hang in there Katie, you are doing a great job!

Lindsay Ropella said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Saying a prayer for you guys! I'm sure it's nothing, but I can't imagine how scary this is..especially when a doctor reacts way more than you were expecting them to. Maybe she's just too active for her own good and burning all her calories right off! ;)

two birds said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Being a mom means you never stop worrying. It's a normal feeling until you know everything is ok! Hang in there. Prayers for you and Addi!

Savanna said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Worrying is such a natural thing when it comes to being a mom. I hope all of her test results come back normal. But something to keep in mind, you have mentioned several times you are on the smaller side. More than likely, she will be too. I have plenty of small friends whose kids don't gain a lot of weight every month but they are healthy, eat well and that is all that matters.

Dawn said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

The best thing our pediatrician ever did was overreact (or so he thought) saved my son's life. I pray nothing is wrong and you just have a compact child!

Lindsay @ Pursuit of Pink said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

We went through a somewhat scary situation when I was pregnant with Kendall, the doctors had us worrying for really no reason. Sadly, these days they have to be extra careful and tell us everything because if they miss anything someone will sue the pants off of them. They are just covering all bases, when I'm sure there isn't much to worry about. I'm praying for you and Addi, my sweet friend. What you wrote is THE TRUTH. God will protect Addi, He will take care of her. Satan is just trying to scare you. I recommend reading Lisa Bevere's Girls With Swords, it really helped me cling to God's Word to fight the evil thoughts that creep into my mind. XOXO

Angie said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Prayers for you and your baby girl. God is in control but I don't have to tell you that, you already know.

Betty said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I struggle with worry almost daily..and it has only increased during my pregnancy! Thank you for the reminder that God is in control and that he will always take care of us! We will be praying for your sweet little girl.

Lauren Smisko said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

My first was at the 85th percentile for weight at birth and then continued to drop until he wasn't even on the chart. We saw a doctor who wanted to put him under general anesthesia to test him for a disease he didn't even have the majority of symptoms of. We ended up switching pediatricians and our new pediatrician basically said, look at you, you're skinny, he's skinny. He's growing and developing. It's fine. That was the best choice we ever made. He's five and a half now and perfectly healthy. Some kids just aren't big eaters and that's okay. Good luck!

pastedreams said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

She looks incredibly healthy and happy to me! Hang in there mama. You can only weed out the worst anxieties by taking action, but the rest is up to God. And you are right. . .evil uses our anxieties against us to keep us down. To keep us from achieving all we can and choosing to trust God.