. . . for Lauren and Lauren: pregnancy self esteem

February 6, 2013

pregnancy self esteem


Want to know how to make your pregnancy self esteem go completely downhill?  

Start looking up and comparing your 17 week baby bump or any week bump to someone else's.  Or read about how much weight others have or really haven't gained by this point.  Because somehow I thought it would be a good idea or help me feel better about this awkward pregnancy stage.  

Well big lesson learned. 

And I feel a little embarrassed to admit this but here is the ugly truth.  I felt jealous and starting wishing that I had this cute, hard little bump rather than feeling like I just look like I gained ten pounds of awkwardness. 
 
I read this pregnant person's blog, who was about as far along as I was, and she was excited and celebrating each pound gained.  In all honesty I wanted to ask her really? Maybe that's because you're a size zero and every pound is placed into a cute little bump on your belly. 
 
And then it was like this slap in the face.  When I realized that I was wishing for something completely superficial, when I have a healthy baby growing inside of me.  A baby that I would do anything for, carry any weight or look however I needed to if it meant he or she would be mine.

So here's to not letting comparisons get in the way of the happiness and joy I have for this baby.  And to knowing that every mama, belly, baby is different.  Probably a good lesson to learn now and try to hold on to throughout this pregnancy and then even after too, as I'm pretty sure that is something all moms and moms-to-be deal with.  

Photobucket


Pin It!

57 comments:

Denise said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You are beautiful.

Whitney said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Are you kidding me? You look adorable! Your belly will definitely get there soon, it will be huge! I hate hate hate when I compare something of mine to someone else, it makes me feel so crappy! I have been trying so hard to stop doing that.

Faith said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You look amazing! I'm so serious! If I look half as good as you when I am I'll be delirious with happiness!! :)

Bonnie Rose said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

What an honest blog post. I love that. But girl know how beautiful you are and look. I think us girls are the worst when it comes to comparisons. Enjoy your prefnancy you look so stylish. xx Bonnie Rose

CM | My Life, Laughs, and Love said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

that's right GF, stop worrying - you look AMAZING - you're glowing + so adorable, regardless of what you think =) Not to mention there are some people who have it worse off than you (people will NEVER notice they're preggo b/c they're unhealthily large to begin with) food for thought! Love to you and baby xx

Marci Smith said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You look absolutely adorable!! And more than that...God is smiling down on you watching you grow His precious gift.

The comparison game does bite us all. It can be so maddening and depressing. Know that your baby girl wouldn't want any other mama growing her. She is thrilled to be right next to your sweet heart.

Deirdre said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Loving the pop of purple! Cheers*

Sybil@PeaceitallTogether said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I love the quote, "Comparison is the thief of joy." So true! Just remember...you look just like you are supposed to for your baby and your body. Love the purple leggings! :)

Ameryn Marie said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You have the cutest little bump! I know I was comparing myself to others, but wishing I had GAINED more and that I had a big bump too! lol! Now I have put on almost 5 pounds in just two weeks! It all catches up! Enjoy your tiny bump while it's tiny, it will be growing so fast now!

Jennifer @ Delightfully Noted said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Oh my gosh I thought I was the only one fretting over this!!! Seriously, to the point where every day I was obsessed with the thought that I don't have a cute bump....same thing just the chubby 10 lbs, pot belly! Then things really went down hill when I saw a blogger who is like 8 weeks ahead of me and realized I gained more weight in my first tri then she has in her whole pregnancy!! But you are right we should just be grateful for the little miracles we have!!

Jessica said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

your beautiful :) you look great!!

Ashley said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You looks so cute and happy! I think we all have days where we don't feel our best.

Justina F. Lee said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Great words of wisdom. I feel that sometimes, and have to tell myself that I am perfect the way I am.

Breenah said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I gained about 30 with my pregnancy, lost almost all of it, but gained about ten back. I have 23 lbs to lose to get back to my pre-preggo weight. There was a LONG time I couldn't read any bloggers talk about being pregnant because I was SO MUCH bigger than them. I was bigger to begin with so it really didn't make me feel good. I finally got over it because everybody's bodies are different.

Anywho, you look fab and as long as you're healthy it doesn't matter what your bump looks like.

Amanda said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You're so gorgeous. Love this outfit. And I can't believe you're almost half way already!!! :)

Giovanna said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Such a cute look! Loving the purple tights and how you added the leopard belt!

xx
Giovanna
www.HeyLoveBlog.com

Jen said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Oh Katie, it is so true!! It is so hard not to compare yourself and your belly to other people's but EVERYONE is so different. And don't feel beat yourself up- right or wrong everyone does it! You are so blessed to have your little miracle growing inside and you really do look great! The awkward stage will end soon enough and you will have your un-mistakable pregnancy bump. And you will love it. Then in a few more months you will be longing for the time you barely looked pregnant :)

Courtney Bready said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Oh AMEN!!! I just had my second baby in September and he came via c-section.... The awesome scar and horrible re-stretched stretch marks made me cry every time I looked in the mirror for months. Then I realized, Hey! These are my trophies for a job well done! I have a healthy, happy, beautiful baby. I'd proudly wear those scars on my FACE if it meant I'd still have him :)

Kelly {Sparkles and Shoes} said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I still do not even think like you look pregnant - you are going to be such an amazing mom!

xx
Kelly
Sparkles and Shoes

Bethany Reine' said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

it is just the beginning! right now, you wish you had the belly. soon, you'll be working SO HARD to get rid of it, ha! but honestly, it is an ongoing struggle of motherhood, submitting to each stage of sacrifice as you bring a child into the world and then teach it to leave you. and you're right- you are blessed, no matter what your belly looks like :)

Kristine -Heart Shaped Sweat said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

First off...I think you're getting the "glow". You're hair looks fab in this picture and your smile is beaming. You look beautiful. Your babe and your body are unique to you. Secondly, that dress. I love a cotton t-shirt dress but I always think of them as bathing suit cover ups. why have I not thought to wear them like you have with the belt, tights, and boots?!! Great look, thanks for the tip!

Jessica @ Here(and)Now said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Katie,
You are beautiful.
Tell yourself that everyday.
xx

Here&Now

Head to Toe Chic said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Every pregnant woman is different for sure. I know so many people who gained most of their weight towards the end, but all that matters is your baby is healthy! I can definitely tell that this pregnancy is making you glow!

xo,
Angela

Kerry June said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

i had the same problem when i was first pregnant! but you look adorable and have such a cute tiny baby bump, it's seriously adorable. i keep reminding myself not to compare myself to anyone else, so remember that too!

Kristin said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

So the comparison issue never really goes away...

I think you look great, and when you have that sweet baby, it'll all be worth it!

Carly said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You look amazing!!! I'm sure its such a strange transition, but I hope that you are feeling well this week and enjoying the ride a bit!

Carly
www.lipglossandcrayons.com

Torrie said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I had to finally stop lookin up "___ weeks pregnant" when I was pregnant because it was more hurtful than helpful. It's so easy to compare but hard to remember that every woman's body is different so of course we'll all be pregnant differently! I was as huge as a house by the end, but only put on 30 lb. Just try to remember that any way your body changes it's all for a healthy baby in there :)

readeatcreate.com said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Don't worry about what anyone else looks like. I know it's hard and it's your first baby so of course you want the cute round belly but by the time your 30 weeks along I bet you'll want to give that round belly right back to wherever it came from! As long as you and the little babes are healthy that's all that matters!
xoxo

Brianne Bracco said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Love your leopard belt and your purple leggings! Your little baby bump is the cutest accessory for your adorable outfit. :)

Katie {katie lately} said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I'm virtually flicking your forehead miss Katie! Don't do that!!! You are SO beautiful & you look tiny to me! Give it a few more months, you'll look back at these pictures and think "oh my gosh, I thought THAT was a bump?" just wait :)

In this blogging world its hard not to compare yourself to other people in the same shoes as you, and especially when you're pregnant. But every pregnancy is SO different, and this one gets to be uniquely yours :)

Honestly, it's cool you're realizing this now though. Because once you get towards the end you'll want to compare symptoms, deliveries, post partum stuff, etc and you just have to keep telling yourself that this is your story and its perfect!

I'll add a sidenote that gaining weight just isn't easy, baby or not! But when you have that little peanut in your arms, and your husband loving you more than ever, it really is all worth it.

Love you!!

Priscila@mommode said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

The biggest lesson I've had to learn (and I'm still learning) as a mom is to never compare myself or my child to another mom. It is such a trap. Someone at my baby shower told me to always tell myself that God chose no one else but me to be Oliver's mama. Little did I know how often I'd have to remind myself of that because I ahd fallen into the comparison game. Hoping and praying you can focus on the joy and when you don't, remember that God chose no one else but you to be your sweet baby's mama. :)

Jen said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

It won't be long until you have to stand sideways at the sink to do dishes & won't be able to paint your toenails. ;)

Annie said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You look fantastic Katie, and not awkward at all! And even if you feel awkward...just remember that cute little peanut growing inside you and then it's all worth it :)
Love the leopard belt with that outfit - so cute!

Annie
The Other Side of Gray

Lora said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I think you look awesome!!

Helene said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I truly think you look beautiful!

vogueandheels said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I know that you look gorgeous! Congratulations on your baby and I am loving your style. Super comfortable yet chic.

-Vogue&Heels
vogueandheels.wordpress.com

Amanda said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I think I'll probably want to walk around saying, "I'm not fat. I'm pregnant" to everyone I meet. Ha. I might not be pregnant, but I totally get this :)

acornmanphotography said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You look amazing! I also wanted to again thank you (and my husband since it will be his) for the new phone! Cannot wait to get it:)

still being [molly] said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

katie you are BEAUTIFUL! and your little baby bump is adorable. we ALL struggle with this stuff. here i am over here and i feel HUGE already and i'm three weeks behind you so i'm having panics that i'm going to gain a ton of weight and never be able to lose it and that my husband is going to not find me attractive anymore, etc. etc. (i've struggled with weight my whole life). i mean, my best friend here is six months pregnant and she JUST started looking pregnant like last week. It's crazy. Every woman is different, every pregnancy is different, but each of them BEAUTIFUL. but, we all have our insecurities. and you know what that is? that is the enemy trying to get us and bring us down. that's the enemy telling us we are no good. but God tells us differently. God is doing a work on that miracle baby inside of you and HE, only HE is in control of that baby and it's amazing life. You are going to be an amazing mother. <3 you, Katie. Chin up!

Sandy a la Mode said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

please don't compare your preggo belly to others!! everyone is different and you are gorgeous! :)

xo,
Sandy
Sandy a la Mode

Holly said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Definitely a good lesson. Comparison is the thief of joy - what a bitch ;) xoxoxo

J and A said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You look beautiful!!! And you are right, who cares what you gain or look like, you have your sweet baby growing in there! And you just wait, you will have a big hard belly in no time!

christina said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

you are so not alone! don't worry those feelings can totally be blamed on hormones.lol

I had a "friend" tell me "oh look! your past the is she getting chubby? or is she pregant stage?" lol. nice.

p.s. I gained 50 + lbs my last go around.

loved your post and you are so right it is all worth it!!

TheTinyHeart said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You and your little baby bump are looking super cute! You can't compare yourself to others or else you'll drive yourself nuts.

-Sharon
The Tiny Heart
Necklace Giveaway!

Eliza :: Case Study said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Congratulations!! Your bump is perfect :) I've been so behind on blog reading lately I must have missed your announcement. So wonderful! xoxo, eliza

Treasure Tromp said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I think that you are just the cutest preggers lady :)

Katie @ My Darling Days said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Oh you stop! You are adorable, either way :)

Laura said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I could totally understand how you could get sucked in to comparing pregnancy bodies. I compare myself to everyone, and I know how quickly you can spiral down to feeling terrible about myself. Good for you for catching it and reminding yourself of what REALLY matters - you have a healthy growing baby in your belly! One that you have prayed for for over 2 years! How exciting is that??! :)

Carolina said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

wow - i am totally in love with your blog! it is gorgeous! keep on the good work - i follow now! <3
i'd be very glad if u could visit my blog too :)

POCKETFUL OF DREAMS

Carolina said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

wow - i am totally in love with your blog! it is gorgeous! keep on the good work - i follow now! <3
i'd be very glad if u could visit my blog too :)

POCKETFUL OF DREAMS

Sunny & Star said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I think you look beautiful. And you will have a stunning, adorable baby.

Tracy @ Sunny Days and Starry Nights

Bria said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

hey girl!

i don't normally comment on blogs but i have been reading yours off and on for a little while and wanted to wish you congratulations on your pregnancy!!

i myself am four months post partum having given birth in october. and no lie, it is tough, i had people telling me at 7 months "hmm you don't look pregnant" a compliment yes, but also then what did i do? friggin swallow a basketball?

will it all be worth it in the end? absolutely, but it is a hard road the first time, you can't really imagine/fathom the end result at least i couldn't... (really a baby? am i going to be allowed to take him/her home with me?). and our culture loves to worry, which i loved to buy into. i recently wrote on my calendar where i would see it every day "worrying does not make you a better mom, wife, or friend. it is not a prevention cure and it does not add joy, happiness, or contentment to your life. release it"

this is so rambling, but i hope maybe you get a little clarity out of it. you will defn be in my prayers the rest of your pregancy!

Whitney@SomethingBroughtYouHere said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Well said. I just have to keep reminding myself to not worry about the way my body looks, just how precious the little one inside is growing!
Xo,
Whitney

Erin Rethemeyer said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

Reading this I could only think about how strong you are, to write that, admit that - I don't know how you feel but I can only imagine it is challenging. You are already a GREAT mom!

JulieAnn said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

You're adorable!

And don't get me started on people's comments to pregnant women... the only thing acceptable is "you look amazing"... or adorable, or gorgeous, or beautiful. People told me I looked tiny - then I freaked out because I was afraid my baby was going to be too small. If they say you look huge, you take it personally. People! NO COMMENTS ABOUT SIZE! Every woman carries each pregnancy differently. But all are gorgeous :) You particularly!

Shay said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I know it is so hard trying to keep your identity when your body is changing into something you cannot control but I think you look fabulous!

Bethany@http://thislittleestate.blogspot.ca/ said... Best Blogger TipsBest Blogger Templates

I can COMPLETELY agree with how you are feeling!!!

I have had three babies and each time had worked my way down to a petite size. But with every pregnancy I dreaded the weight. I must say though, enjoy it now, it is hard to do when you are "in in" and feeling stretched to your limit, figuratively and physically. It is such a short time in retrospect of life with your sweet baby, and that bump you have is SO cute. Seriously. Sending you mountains of joy your way mama!!!