I've shared multiple times that we have had our fair share of nursery struggles with Addilyn during church. Some weekends I start getting anxious Saturday night, thinking about the nursery worker prying Addilyn off of me and her screaming mama. I have a hard time focusing during the service knowing she's crying and then picking her up with her blotchy face and big tears, and extra clingy self the rest of the day. I struggle to not feel like the workers are wondering why after all this time she hasn't pulled herself together and learned to be okay in there.
We've been pretty consistent for the last five months with going, and leaving her in there even though she is crying. A few weeks ago I came back to the service after the nursery worker had to pry her off of me and I left her screaming. I was working hard to not cry myself, and my friend sitting in front of me texted me that I'm a great mom and am doing a good job. When I texted back that it feels so hard and almost hopeless she responded with this could be your 7th lap.
She was reminding me of a talk we heard at the if gathering. The speaker spoke about Joshua, who was called to take over the city of Jericho, but not in the way you'd expect. God called him to take his men and march around the city walls for seven days. And on the seventh day to shout and blow their trumpets and that then the walls would crash down. They were obedient to what God was calling them to do, despite no results for the first six days. It wasn't until the seventh day that the walls fell. (Joshua 6)
The men had no idea if it would happen. If they would've quit on the sixth day, no progress would have been made. They just had to stick it out one more day.
One more day. And the walls just fell down.
What if I give up and that week is the week we'd turn a corner and Addilyn would tough it out without crying the entire service?
I'm not a person that likes to give up. Probably to a fault. But there are certainly things in life that sometimes make me want to quit. I wanted to quit multiple times while training for the marathon. But I persevered and ran that seventh lap and finished the race. No doubt I had points in our infertility battle where I did not want to do one more IVF treatment, but that seventh lap gave us Addilyn. There's times I've wanted to give up on the same prayer request I've prayed for months after months, but I know that my seventh lap will come in that area too. I'm going to continue to be consistent in those things that I know will be worth it. Because maybe the next time it will be my seventh lap.