Welcome
I am learning quickly that it is time I stop counting on things going a certain way in terms of motherhood. I was so happy that we started getting into some kind of bedtime routine with Addilyn. Stories, praying, swaddling, nursing and bed. It worked pretty great for about a week and half and I started counting on having an hour or so before I went to bed.
While I'm happy we started a routine I think it's set me up for disappointment when this last week three nights in a row Addilyn had no desire to go to bed until after 9:30.
Tuesday nights are normally small group nights but I stayed home while Chris went. I was greatly looking forward to putting Addilyn to bed and having an hour or two of alone time, which is something that I thoroughly enjoy but have had pretty much zero of since Addilyn's been born. I had made cookies earlier in the day and had this great plan of putting her to bed, eating cookies and catching up on blogs/emails while watching tv. Sounds super exciting right? Well it sounded absolutely wonderful to me.
Clearly Addilyn had a much different plan. Long, exhausting story short, it was a couple hours of almost asleep to wide awake on repeat about two million times. Rationalizing with a ten week old does not work. But believe me I tried.
And I cried and was really frustrated that my plan for the evening went the complete opposite. By ten o'clock when she was finally asleep I was exhausted and stayed up to shove two cookies in my mouth before I went right to bed. Only to get in bed and stare at my baby and her flailing arms as if she was a ticking time bomb ready to explode and need me at any second. I won't go into the all to exciting details but thanks to my sister's analogy, it was like trying to put a restless kangaroo to sleep all night long.
So welcome to putting my baby's needs and plans ahead of mine. Welcome to giving up my "plans" and attempting but failing at going with the flow. Welcome to sacrificing alone time and routines for the time being.
Welcome to motherhood, right?
25 comments:
Welcome to motherhood...where it's not all sunshine and rainbows. Where it's okay to feel frustrated and in love at the same time. Although I do get more alone time now that my kids are older, it is never something that I expect, just because I'd rather be pleasantly surprised when it does happen, rather than deeply disappointed when it doesn't :)
I have been there. There will come a time when she will go to bed when you want her to--someday.:) Hang in there! You're doing great!
Right! your idea of a nice night alone is the same as mine... Haha. Funny how the simple things become such a treat as a new mother. You are doing a great job, everything with babies is just a season or 'phase' so hopefully this one passes soon :)
I know exactly what you mean. Aubrey did not stay asleep in the pack and play for longer than 10 minutes at a time the last few nights. She has been sleeping on my chest, which means I'm not :(
yes! welcome to motherhood! i really think God uses parenting to prove that HIS plans are what we should be yielding to. it's just so tough because with kids, the plans are constantly changing, depending on their attitudes, health and ever changing needs. it's all about sanctification and i'm so thankful he deems us worthy enough for such a task :) (btw-i'm totally preaching to myself here...the sleepless nights are just around the corner, ahh!!)
I agree with Sybil 100%. And here is the thing, this mom who as of tomorrow will no longer even be able to say she is a mom of a teenager (baby girl turns 20)...would welcome that unexpected late night with my girls. I can also say, mom time is something that doesn't happen very often...at least until they leave the nest. And then, when you have the time...you don't even know what to do with it! LOL I finally approached each day with, "God, you will not mine." That way, if something came up or plans changed, I knew God was the one in charge (helped me not get frustrated with my girls).
Yep, been here. It will get better, I promise. I'm sure you're doing a great job!
Ginny
She is precious!
xo Jessica
www.NewlyLoved.com
You are such an amazing momma. Her name I am obsessed with. SO beautiful.
You are such an amazing momma. Her name I am obsessed with. SO beautiful.
Katie--
I'm in the exact same boat so your post on motherhood rings extra true to me tonight. My baby girl just turned 4 months old and she likes to keep my on my toes. I'm a very scheduled/organized/slightly neurotic :) person so her lack of scheduling has been a good lesson in patience for me. Olive does something different each day, finds a routine for a few days and likes to keep me guessing. I keep reminding myself that my job is to be a good mom and I don't need to fret about my to do lists and my own expectations. She's only a baby once so I need to live in the moment and enjoy her. Hang in there! Glad to know I'm not alone :) Whitney
This is probably the biggest thing i will have to learn patience with once my little one is born (less than 5 weeks, eeek!). I am used to "me time" all the time and whenever I want it, so, this will definitely be the biggest adjustment. That, and no longer getting 11 hours of sleep per night LOL
don't know what this feels like but hope to some day. stay strong mama! your beautiful and yes babies do have minds of their own :) blessings!
Oh, it's hard, I know! But that routine will come, don't worry!
Well said. My daughter is 12 and I still have to let go of my plans more than I would like. I have grandiose ideas of how things will be just perfect, but I have slowly given those ideas up and allowed God to take control. The sleeping gets better though my friend. Hang in there! Susan
It's SO hard to go with the flow sometimes...I'm such a planner too! That pic of you and Addilyn is just gorgeous :)
Annie
The Other Side of Gray
Babies definitely do what they want to do! I hope she will settle into a sleep schedule soon and you can get some alone time back!
-Sharon
The Tiny Heart
Sept. Group Giveaway!
Oh sweetie your post totally reminds me of when my son was little. It's so hard, because all you want is a couple of hours to yourself and it's sometimes too much to ask of a baby. I remember getting so frustrated with my son and I still do sometimes. Motherhood is not easy. It will get easier though, but yes patience is a true virtue.
Agi:)
vodkainfusedlemonade.com
i can't even imagine how hard it is to put down a newborn! I think it's totally normal that things don't go according to plan!
I am learning that according to plan is something that is said before the plan never goes accordingly. And this is without being a mother yet, so I can only imagine...I wish for better sleepy nights for you my friend and more adorable pictures of the two of you like this one! ;)
Yes, welcome!! :)
It wasn't until M was about 5 months old that our bed time routine was down pat, and he slept all the way through the night.
Hang in there, nights like these don't last forever.
My son is 8 weeks old, and although we haven't had a problem at night time yet, naps are so hard! He just doesn't like to take them and fights it so hard. But I also get frustrated when I see his arms and legs wiggling all around and keeping him awake. He is a master at breaking out of swaddles. I bought a woombie on Amazon, and love it though! Totally cuts down on the busy arms and legs. They're a little pricey but SO worth it in my eyes.
You're such a good mom! :) Love the picture!
ah man. I'm not a mama yet, but I can only imagine how hard it must be to adjust! You are doing your best, so don't worry about the rest :) PS: The pic of you and your babe... PRECIOUS.
Your a GREAT mommy Katie :)
Post a Comment